Life's a beach...

(Michael blogging...) Well - since Spring break was last week, we felt obligated and moved to head to the beach. So, Thursday evening we packed up the Honda and headed south to Yachats.

Apparently that wasn't fast enough for Carter, who woke up that morning, donned the most beach-appropriate attire he could cull from his dresser, and declared to Laura that he was "ready to go." At 9:00 AM. Sadly, Carter would have to wait for me to get home around 4:30 before we could start moving.

Although we were only there for a few days, we really packed in a lot of activity and adventure. We started out on the way with a quick trip through Newberg and a stop at Jem 100 for dinner and ice cream. One more pit stop at the Newport Fred Meyer for sundries (and earbuds for Emma's DS) we pulled into Yachats about a few hours later.

Friday morning was nice as the kids all slept in for a bit and we had a great breakfast of sausage, eggs, OJ, and relaxation. After a quick call into Fred Meyer for a phone conference, we went to the Oregon Coast Aquarium in Newport (the former home of Keiko the whale).


All the kids enjoyed the jellyfish and the sharks and a particularly gross eel who kept poking his wrinkly, gray face out of a craggy rock and looking very much like a SpongeBob character. The trip was capped off by enjoying colored, crystallized sugar on a stick.

We knew our luck with the weather wouldn't hold - so we made sure to get down to the beach the next day and all the kids had a great time at Neptune Beach just down Highway 101 a few miles. Carter was intent on chucking as much sand, rocks, and logs into the creek with the giant ker-plunks and water spray and then spent some time playing in the water with Brendan and Harry. Justin forded the creek to get to the other side to explore the caves and forests and possible Goonies sightings. Ethan crossed the stream as well...in his denim jeans. 'Nuff said.

Eventually - we headed back to Yachats and played Rumicube, popped some popcorn and had dinner at Roca Mar. Alas - the trip had to end and we came home.

Can't wait to get back again in the summer.

At least Jerry Seinfeld made it funny...

(Michael blogging...) Okay - today we had some uninvited and very unwelcome guests. About 10–15 thousand of them.

I was about to leave for a 2:30 appointment with H&R Block and went out to the back deck to tell Laura I was leaving. I chatted with her for a few moments and then noticed - up in the air above the neighbor's house...a giant swarm of bees.

Now - when you hear someone say a "swarm" of bees, you may think they are merely engaging in hyperbole or are prone to hysterics. However, this was a literal swarm of bees. And, for whatever reason - they decided that our chimney seemed a fitting and humble abode. So - they proceeded to amass there. As they did - several of the nasty fuckers found there way into the house and met their grisly doom by means of Laura and the Dyson vacuum cleaner of death. We have about 100 or so dead bees in the dirt chamber at the moment. (Actually, not too sure how to dispose of them - come to think of it.)

The wood stove was actually humming and vibrating with the sound of the bees within and we knew (read: feared) that if we dared open the door to the stove - the bees would belch out into the living room and...well...we'd just have to move - that's all.


Anyhow - we managed to open the stove door quickly enough to throw a flaming newspaper wad into it and then - in rapid fits and starts - we added more paper and hoped that it would smoke them out of the chimney. And it did! Right out of the chimney and onto the pergola over the deck.

They decided to choose (I suppose according to The Queen Bee's directive??) a comfy corner of a pergola post and ... then ... they just stayed there and started to build a freakin' beehive.

In the meantime, when we were smoking them out - we managed to set off the smoke detector in the house - which, of course, is hard-wired to the fire department. So we had a fire truck with three fully geared-up firemen at our doorstep a few moments later. Great. I had to turn them away and try to smile as one them kept telling me to "BEE safe" from now on. I gave him a toothy grin, waved goodbye, gritted my teeth and muttered, "...Jackass...".

Well - better to have the bees out there than in the chimney, I suppose. Nevertheless, time to call the professionals.

We got a hold of a beekeeper from Milwaukee who was able to come out and scoop them away. Literally. He scooped them up into a small wooden box using a metal dustpan.

The ones he didn't get via the scoop method, he used a burning wad of burlap to smoke them away and many of them flew up into the box to rejoin their queen.

Our neighbors peered over the fence and watched the professionals do their thing. It was actually kind of interesting to watch and it only cost me $10 for his gas money. So - if you ever need a beekeeper...or maybe want to buy some bees, give Jim a call at 503-659-9718.

As of the next morning, the left-behinds have reformed their ranks and are in a tiny cluster about as big as my fist in the same spot on the pergola. Probably no more than 200 of them now.

I don't know if they're going to draw straws and decide who gets to be the new Queen - or perhaps the original Queen is still among them. The beekeeper assured me that he got the Queen because of the sheer odds involved when he took 99.9 percent of the bees. However, when he referred to this as "Murphy's Law" I was a little less than reassured. Hope he's a better beekeeper than a bard.

Project 40 - one month in

(Michael blogging...) Okay - it's been one month since I started "Project 40" - my attempt to return to my high school weight before my 40th birthday in January of 2011.

In sum: I started February at 202.75 pounds and ended the month at 196.75. I ran over 30 miles over the course of the month and played lots of basketball and hit the weights a bit, too.

I think the next few months should be the "make or break" time and my goal is to hit 190.00 before Easter Sunday. Then I can eat everyone's chocolate bunnies.